Lord, Be My Vision

January 18, 2006

I’m having trouble with my eyesight again. I pulled out my pocket eye card and could only see 20/200 with my left eye and my glasses on. This means I have to be at 20 feet to see what most people can see at 200 feet. My right eye is better at 20/25. Through all of this, I want to rest in the Lord. He knows all about my eyes and is in control. If I go blind like my uncle, God will continue to provide for me like He always has through the years. I am so glad that He goes before me.

January 27, 2006

The retinal specialist said my eye looked healthy on the inside, so he is not sure why my vision has decreased so much. He decided to review my head scan from a year ago when I fell and was unconscious for awhile. He also is sending me for a second opinion to another retinal specialist.

February 11, 2006

I will instruct you and teach you in the way which you should go; I will guide you with My eye. Psalm 32:8

I saw Dr. N. yesterday for the second opinion and he said I have a cataract. He did a test on me where I looked through a pinhole and could see 20/20 which confirms it! This means the lens in my eye has become cloudy over the years. It’s a relatively easy outpatient surgery to remove my lens and place a new one in my eye which should give me 20/20 vision so I no longer need to wear glasses! I can hardly believe this news. I have worn thick glasses since I was 6 years old and have uncorrected vision of 20/1000.

April 8, 2006

Beloved, now are we the children of God, and it does not yet appear what we shall be, but we know that when He shall appear, we shall be like Him, for we shall see Him as He is. I John 3:2

I had my left cataract removed two days ago. I returned to the eye doctor’s office yesterday to have my patch removed. It was an amazing experience as the whole world appears so bright with beautiful colors, and I can see 20/20! Dr. E. said my vision might not stay quite 20/20 after the lens settles in. I can hardly believe the difference in all the colors. It’s like the yellow haze was removed. I think it’s a little taste of how beautiful everything will appear in heaven when I see the Lord and have my new body. Even so, COME, Lord Jesus!”  Revelation 22:20

April 20, 2006

So much has changed since I last wrote. I’m having a terrible time with nausea and headaches because I see two different sizes with each eye. I wear a contact lens in my right eye that still has the cataract. My brain is having a hard time adjusting to 20/20 vision in my newly implanted lens. Then I got a head cold and was so sick that I missed all the Easter services which was sad. This is my third week off of work, so my Dad flew up from Florida to help me out. Dr. E. is on vacation so I saw his partner who told me to patch my right eye and learn to drive and work with one eye. He also said to call Dr. E. to do the other eye as soon as possible.

I drove down the highway with one eye patched which was really scary since I have no depth perception. I asked my Dad to drive home which was just as scary. He has a shuffling gait and can’t remember directions at all. His hearing has also decreased. I think he has early dementia or Parkinson’s disease which is so sad. (See previous post.) He went with me to prayer meeting last night for which I was thankful. On the way home, the stars and glare around all the oncoming headlights was awful. I wonder if I will be able to drive at night anymore? Maybe that will go away once I’m off all the eye drops. I called Human Resources at work to check on short term disability, but they said I don’t have it since I haven’t worked there a year yet. God always provides and won’t test me above what I can bear.

It was difficult to drive with only one eye because I had no depth perception.

I’m thankful for this extra time with my Dad as we look at the beautiful spring flowers in bloom, walk through the woods together, and see historic sites nearby.

My Dad came to help me for 3 weeks. We enjoyed seeing all the spring flowers in bloom.

May 9, 2006

The Lord upholds all who fall, and raises up all who are bowed down. Psalm 145:14

How I praise God for the work He has done in my life the past few weeks. Dr. E. removed my right cataract on May 4, four weeks after my left cataract was removed. The next day after the patch was removed, my eyes began working together. We also stopped the Nevanac (NSAID) eye drop which was causing the nausea. What a relief to be rid of the nausea! It was such a joy to rejoin the choir yesterday at church and sing The Solid Rock.

When darkness veils His lovely face, I rest on His unchanging grace;

In every high and stormy gale, My anchor holds within the veil.

On Christ, the solid Rock I stand – all other ground is sinking sand,

All other ground is sinking sand.    –by Edward Mote

Christ is my solid Rock!


How I thank God every day for giving me corrected unclouded vision. I later was told I developed cataracts at the age of 51 because I have a disorder which caused calcium deposits to cloud my lenses.  I still need to wear thin glasses to read to correct my astigmatism. One of the unexpected treats is to be able to see clearly when I go swimming. I can still drive at night as the glare and stars around all the headlights went away once I finished the eye drops. But most of all, I look forward to that day when I will see my dear Savior face to face in heaven above with perfect vision in my new body.






Thanksgiving, 2017

“In everything give thanks, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.” I Thessalonians 5:18

Dear Readers,

It seems hard to believe that I began writing this blog four years ago after attending a Christian writer’s conference. My goals in recording what God has taught me during nearly 40 years of nursing is to glorify Him, encourage Christian nurses, and reveal to young people what nursing is all about.  I pray godly Christians will enter the field with realistic expectations.

As many baby boomers like myself retire, we need young men and women to fill the ranks who will give compassionate excellent care to their patients from a heart filled with Christ’s love. Nursing was often a challenging and difficult occupation, but the rewards were great whenever I had the opportunity to point one of my patients to my dear Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ.

I thank the Lord for each of you who come from over 130 countries around the world. When I began to write this blog, I didn’t know if anyone would ever read it, but nearly 7000 people have now discovered it. The main countries where you, my readers, reside are USA, Brazil, Canada, United Kingdom, Philippines, Germany, India, Australia, Italy, and France. Thank you for those of you who have told others about my blog. I’m hoping that I will have time to complete recording my nursing career journey over the next months.

I retired 18 months ago, but have been busy ever since with Spanish language school for seven months, relocating, and several travel trips thrown in there. People warned me that retirement could be busy, and I have found that to be the case! But it has been  enjoyable to make new friends in different corners of the world. I thank God for a good measure of health He has given me.

As we celebrate my favorite holiday here in the USA, Thanksgiving, I thank the Lord for each of you. I pray you will receive the Lord Jesus Christ as your personal Savior if you have not already done so. If I can answer any questions you may have about salvation or pray for you specifically, please email me at pamela.aprn@gmail.com.   For those of you who are fellow believers, may you continue to grow in His grace and keep ” looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith…” Hebrews 12:2. 

Happy Thanksgiving!


Blog Update – May, 2017

“For I am the Lord, I change not.” Malachi 3:6

“…He hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee. So that we may boldly say, The Lord is my helper, and I will not fear what man shall do unto me.” Hebrews 13:5-6

This past year has been a whirlwind of change for me during my first year of retirement from nursing. In the midst of all the changes, God was my solid Rock, the only One who never changes. The Lord laid a desire on my heart to try and learn Spanish so I could minister to Spanish speaking people here in the USA and in other countries. I knew some survival Spanish from my travels and took one semester of Spanish at the local college many years ago. I have wanted to be fluent in another language for many years, so God gave me peace about selling my home in New England, getting rid of most of my belongings, and putting the rest in a storage container while I went to full-time language school in the USA near the Mexican border. I made some progress there, but the extreme heat exhausted me. My professors suggested I would make more progress through immersion.

So the end of December, I moved to Central America to attend another language school. I enjoyed the school there and was doing well learning Spanish, but I found the culture challenging. The home stay with a family was not acceptable, so I moved to a tiny studio apartment after ten days. Several students were robbed at gunpoint near my apartment, and another student was stabbed in the park in front of his children last year. Thankfully, none of them were seriously injured, but it took an emotional toll on them. Sadly, the drug cartels are taking over Central America as they have most of Mexico.

After seven months of full-time language school which consisted of 4 hours of class every morning and 2 to 4 hours of homework every evening, I was so exhausted that I could no longer concentrate. I also felt very isolated since I had to lock myself behind iron window bars and gates with electric razor wire every evening from dusk to dawn. I had to walk to and from school with my pepper spray in my hand in case I was attacked by people or stray dogs. After praying and talking with the school counselors, God gave me peace that it was time to return to the USA.

I have now resettled in the southern USA, unpacked my container, and am getting settled in a lovely rental home. I hope to resume my Spanish studies with a tutor in a few weeks. I have met a number of native Spanish speakers at several churches I have visited and enjoyed chatting with them in Spanish.

I now realize that there are degrees of “fluency”. One missionary who lived in Panama for five years said, “You never really become fluent.” I wish I was further along than I am with Spanish, but I have to realize that I have age working against me. My brain just doesn’t function quite as quickly or remember new words as readily as when I was younger. One teacher told me that your vocal cords are set at the age of 12, so it’s extremely difficult so sound like a native speaker if you learn a language after that. For any of you who are parents of young children, I definitely recommend having them learn another language at a young age. The first opportunity I had to learn another language was when I was a freshman in high school, 15 years old, which is way too late to begin in my opinion. I’m thankful that the public schools in the USA now often offer foreign languages in elementary school. For any of you who desire to learn a language as an adult, download the fun free app called Duolingo. They have over 15 languages available there and use games to help you learn.

So I have unpacked my journals and am getting my office organized. I plan to resume writing about the final 18 years of my nursing career next week. Thank you for your patience as I repeated the early part of my blog while I was busy in school. I will close with a few photos from the past year.

Sand dunes along the Gulf of Mexico

Port Isabel lighthouse, Texas

Great blue heron


Orchids in Central America

Hummingbird at work